Easy Target

Melanie "Gullible" Sloan. Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it? I think so.

The past couple of weeks, I've had some really odd things happening to my computer at work. The cursor would move by itself - I didn't have my hand anywhere near the mouse. Programs would open and close quickly without me touching the keyboard. Other subtle movements on the screen that left me wondering if I wasn't starting to see things... but they never affected how I did my work, so I never bothered to call MIS (or our help desk) to look into the problem.
Today I was in the middle of a huge project at my desk with several people involved, and I had the MIS guy, three Mailroom runners, and a paralegal nearby working. Suddenly, I glance over at my computer and see that it's going absolutely berserk. Programs are opening and closing faster than I can blink, like a key on the keyboard is being held down or something - but NOTHING is resting on the keyboard causing it, and I'm not anywhere near it. I'm sitting there at a loss... everyone standing around is staring wide-eyed at it, going "What on EARTH is wrong with your computer?" The MIS guy says, "I've never seen anything like that!"
At that point, I started to panic - "Matt, fix it!! Do something! I can't even close the programs!" I was frantically trying to close each program as it opened, but another one would open at the same instant. It was nuts.
I look earnestly at Matt (the MIS guy), and ask him to do something...
At which point an evil smile creeps across his lips and the Mailroom runners and the paralegal all burst into laughter. MIS Matt pulls out a remote control. The spastic programs on my computer stop.
I stare.
"WHAT IS THAT????" I ask MIS Matt.
More laughter.
Mailroom Matt says, "We've been messing with your computer for weeks!"
MIS Matt unhooks something from the back of my computer. "This," he says, holding up a little contraption that resembles a USB port, "is a device that attorneys use when they're doing presentations on their computers. With the remote, it allows them to make their way around the computer without having to actually stand AT the computer."
More laughter. I turn really red and get overheated with embarrassment and a bit of rage. More laughter.
Mailroom Matt says, "Every time one of us has come near your desk, we've had the remote with us so we can mess with your computer and watch you try to figure out what's wrong."
"So all those times my mouse moved on it's own..." More laughter.

Turns out this was a practical joke that they hatched back in February, and executed about three weeks ago. Now that I think about it... I bet it was about the time that I got to work one morning and turned on my computer to hear blaring speakers (they liked to turn my speakers up all the way so everyone in the whole office could hear the Windows jingle play when my computer booted up), but when I turned my speakers off, the noise didn't stop. I discovered later that they actually HID EXTRA SPEAKERS under my desk, and watched as I frantically tried to figure out why my computer was so loud. Yeah, they thought they got me so good that time, and immediately started plans for the next joke... Why didn't they just paint a big target on my forehead and shoot darts at it?

Melanie "Gullible" Sloan. I think I'll put it on my luggage.