The Injustice of Driving

Warning: This is just a random rant. I realize that there is no real injustice in driving, it's all in my head; most of my complaints are my own fault - impatience and lack of planning is all it really is. But just humor me.

See this picture?

I took it while I was driving down the road a few years ago, by sticking my camera out of my sunroof and clicking a picture, not wanting to wait for a stop sign or stoplight - I was afraid I'd miss the brilliance of the setting sun. Oh, that was brilliant, all right - I almost rear-ended someone because I was dividing my attention between the sky and the road in front of me. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer, I admit. The point is that I was being a stupid driver.
Story: I usually take Trax to work. I've discovered that it's safer than road rage, which others will testify that I have in abundance. (I'm NOT a nice person behind the wheel of a car.) Well, last week, I had to drive a couple of days so I could run errands and whatnot. On my way home from the office one night, traveling on the freeway, I was nearly run off the road by some idiot on a cell phone. I thought, 'Okay, maybe it's an emergency call, no need to get upset.' Well, 2 minutes later, it happened AGAIN, different driver, different cell phone. Veering into other lanes, not paying attention. Rather than bore you with the inane details, I'll just say that it happened THREE TIMES on the freeway that day. THREE TIMES I was almost run off the road (or into other lanes) by people on their phones, not paying attention! No lie, I actually counted! Well, by the time I got to my offramp, I was relieved to be almost home, away from stupid drivers who feel the need to look cool or important by talking on their phones in their cars. Where are all the cops when stuff like this happens? I asked myself. Where's the justice for innocent people like myself who have to put up with getting run off the road by idiots? Just then, I was almost run off the road a FOURTH time, by some idiot on a cell phone. I drove up next to the guy, intending to give him a dirty look, and -
It was a cop.
OH! So THAT'S where all the cops are! Busy talking on their cell phones and driving! So THAT'S why they're not pulling the law-breakers over! They're too busy breaking the law themselves! Oh, the injustice of it all...
Can I complain about red stoplights now? I know they're a necessity, and they regulate traffic - but is it necessary for me to hit EVERY SINGLE ONE? I was on my way home again another night, when driving South on Hightland Drive, I counted 12 stoplights between the freeway exit and my house. Guess how many I hit red? 11! Almost EVERY light. So by the time I get home, I'm shaking with frustration and injusice. (Yes, I was just being impatient and moody.) Yesterday morning, I hit all 6 red stoplights between my house and the Trax station. I had to run for the train - I was SOOOO mad. (Yes, poor planning on my part - I left a couple of minutes late.) Today, I hit 5 of them - and I would have only hit 4, but some lady in front of me was taking a leisurely drive and decided to slow down at my last green light and wait for it to turn yellow, at which point she decided to stop. "OH HELL!" I yelled at myself. "YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING! I'M GOING TO MISS MY TRAIN!" (Yes, poor planning again - I left later than I did yesterday.) I was furious, rage flashing in my eyes (and yes, this is only the 8 minute drive from home to Trax, not even a real commute worthy of road rage) and ready to scream as she slowly pulled into the Trax station ahead of me (did she not realize she was going to miss the train too??), and I cursed as I saw someone pull into a really close spot that I could have had, if Miss Daisy hadn't been so freaking slow. I was planning how I was going to kill the slowpoke when... a ray of light!... someone else was pulling out of a very close parking spot, which I immediately whipped into, making it possible for me to make the train on time, while slowpoke would most likely miss the train, BAHAHAHA!! Though, someone WAS looking out for me and got me a spot close to the front... and that poor lady might get fired for being late, and maybe she was driving slow because she had food for the homeless in the front seat, or her tire was almost flat... ohhhh...

I felt like crap my whole ride to work.

Someone needs to take away my drivers license and my car. I'm a menace!

Ramblings...

This picture was taken last year in Midway, after the Schutzenfest 5k that Mar and I did up there.

I find myself with a little bit of time on my hands... and that's rare when I'm at work, which is where I am right now.
I'll just say quickly that I'm down about 12 pounds since my last post about food - I WANTED to be down 14-15 pounds by now, but the weight is coming off slower than I anticipated. At least it's coming off, and - as Muti pointed out - the slower it comes off, the higher my chances are of keeping the weight off permanently. So at this point, I WILL NOT give up, but I WILL say - 12 pounds down, 18 pounds to go until I reach my goal.
On to more ramblings...
I came to a strange conclusion not too long ago. I was ready for Summer to end, and Fall to begin!! I'm NEVER ready for Summer to end. I was trying to pretend that I didn't want Summer to end - I complained about the changing weather, the early snow in the mountains, and the fact that now I have to wear actual shoes and socks to work, rather than sandles, because I'm so cold all the time! But I'm going to welcome Fall with open arms. The bright, vibrant colors on the mountains, decorations, the smoky smell of Halloween (yes, Halloween DOES have a smell), the sweaters and turtlenecks, my heating blanket, hot chocolate (or, hot Postum in my case - it's only 10 calories), candy, socks, seasonal pajamas (I got the Halloween ones out last week! I'm looking forward to my Christmas ones!), pumpkins, the time change to Mountain Standard Time, pumpkin pies, apple pies, Thanksgiving, Christmas music, parties, fun events (like Haunted Deseret for Halloween, and Disneyland at Christmas!), firelight, Christmas movies, and on days that I can stay in - SNOW.
Of course, this all comes with its bad points - the cold, the travelling, the scraping of ice off my windshield in the mornings, the crowds, the fact that I'll have to plan VERY well to get to the Trax station in time enough to walk from the parking lot to the train (which can be quite the jaunt, sometimes) in the cold and snow, to name a few.
However, as I sit here thinking, the good points of Fall and Winter far outweigh the bad points; although, I will say that January and February are pretty dreary months. I'm just going to enjoy September through December, in all their glory.
(And try not to let all the good things about these months ruin my hard work at weight loss!)

I want to hear other peoples' favorite things about Fall and Winter! What do YOU enjoy about this time of year?

Food Post!

This meal totaled 325 calories. 240 for the Cheese Ravioli Lean Cuisine, 60 for the sugar-free vanilla pudding, and 25 for the sugar snap peas. The drink you see is a Black Cherry Fresca - completely diet, no calories. (And not bad, I might add, in spite of its 'diet-ness.')
Just another step during my quest to lose 30 pounds by Christmas. I have to get creative with fruits and veggies, drinks, and treats, since I don't allow myself any less than 1200 calories, or any more than 1500 calories, a day. I can still go out to eat, I just have to be selective and eat small portions. I'm keeping a food journal, where I record every calorie I eat, if possible. I also record the number of minutes I exercise per day, and I weigh myself weekly and keep a record of it also in the food journal.
I've found a 3-mile route that includes some mad uphill time, and I generally like to take a dog with me - preferrably Bo, since Indy is unruly, and Bo needs to lose weight too! Except Indy has more energy... anyhow, they both need it. And so do I, so it works.
In conversations I've had with Mar, Mike, and Melissa, we've all concluded that we think and dwell WAY too much on food and diets. I'm sick and tired of the 'lose and gain' game - I have to lose 30 pounds if I'm going to be at a healthy weight for my height and build. I can understand a 5-pound weight fluctuation - that happens to all women, I'm sure. But I just want to be at a healthy weight, and stop worrying about dieting and food.
So I'm gonna do it. I have until Christmas to lose 26.5 more pounds. (I'm down 3.5 at least, since I've started.)
On another food note ... I'm starting to really enjoy sushi!! I'm disturbed at the amount of calories in it, though - so I can only indulge myself once in a while. The picture below is of 'fake' sushi -just a california roll. Still really good - but my favorites have to include the Philadelphia Roll (smoked salmon, cream cheese, avoado, cucumber, etc.) and the Caterpillar, which is eel wrapped in avocado. Who knew that could be so dang good?? And Wasabe... that hot, green-colored paste is really growing on me, and I find myself using more and more of it in my soy sauce!

Square One

Mmmm... tiger's blood with cream...

Okay, so maybe I'm not back to 'square one,' but I'm getting there. Remember back in November, on my 'Diet Lite' post, when I rambled about trying not to drink too many calories and making exercise a priority? Well, I kinda lost that. Mar and I did a half-marathon in March, and the stress and work it took to train and participate in that drained me of all desire to jog or run at all. Well, for a month or two. I was still walking 6-9 miles a week during lunch hours, but right when I was getting back into running, I klutzed it up big time and fell down the front porch steps and sprained my foot! No more walking on lunch hours... and after three weeks of pain, I finally went to the doctor who said no running for several more weeks. Oh man.
Well, as the days and weeks turned into months, I just got out of the habit of exercise. When I could finally start walking on lunch hours (without pain) again, my friend and I decided to quit for the summer - WAY too hot in the middle of the day to be exercising. I ate and drank pretty much what I wanted because I had been so active for the past several months, and I could maintain my weight; but I still ate and drank what I wanted, while I wasn't able to exercise. OOOHHHHH... last year, I lost somewhere between 15-20 pounds. I'm pretty sure I've gained at least half, if not more, back. I started a new job, which took my to the office earlier, and started taking Trax, which took me to the station even EARLIER - so exercise in the mornings is out, because there's no way I'm getting up at 5:30 to torture myself. I started drinking one soda a day - regular, not diet. Then I went to two sodas a day. The Snoasis opened... I went from having a small snow cone once a week to a medium two or three times a week. I started snacking on candy and granola bars instead of fruit and veggies. I remember thinking last year, 'Cool! Next time I go to the doctor for my yearly check-up and he weighs me, he'll be so impressed!' NOW, my yearly appointment is looming ahead in the next month or two, and here I am thinking, 'Crap, I gotta go to the doctor soon and he's going to weigh me... I better get on the ball!' Not to mention the fact that at cousin Sharon's wedding last weekend, Mom took a picture of me with cousin Rod's wife, Amy - who is stick-thin. I look like a heifer next to her.
So, here I am. I had the first Coke I've had in 3 days today, and I've been downing more water than my usual 2 liters a day, got back into a rigorous exercise routine, started counting my calories again, purchased a pilates DVD to do 2-3 times a week, and even bought a green-tea weight loss supplement.
Here we go again.

Black Helmut Man

Yesterday at work, I had just settled down at my desk after a trip to the kitchen for a drink, when suddenly, I heard Darth Vader breathing - RIGHT BEHIND ME. I whipped around to see who the prankster was, but - no one was around!

I froze.

The 'deer-in-headlights' look appeared on my face.

WHERE WAS THAT NOISE COMING FROM?

Turns out, one of the guys in the mailroom has Darth Vader's breathing pattern as a ringtone for his phone. He slipped it into the pocket of a jacket I have hanging on the back of my chair, and when I sat back down, he got one of the other guys to call it. When I finally stopped searching my desk frantically for Darth Vader, I looked down the hall a bit and saw the two of them watching me from behind a tall plant, laughing hysterically. Clever, really clever. Some day, me and my Sith Posse will get you back...

Weasels.

A Secret to Happiness

"...But, Lizzy, you look as if you did not enjoy it. You are not going to be Missish, I hope, and pretend to be affronted at an idle report. For what do we live, but to make sport for our neighbours, and laugh at them in our turn?" -Mr. Bennett, Pride & Prejudice

Last week, I was at dinner with 'my good friend Holly,' as I like to refer to her (we've been friends for over 10 years), and over our brownie skillet, I asked her advice on a situation that came up a few weeks ago, where I (and another family member) unintentionally offended someone. We were wild with regret and mystified at our forgetfulness over this particular incident; full of apologies and reassurances. But the person we offended feels so hurt, it's hard for her to let go. I wanted to know how I could make it right.
Holly thought for a minute before she said, "You know, I think one of the secrets to being happy is to not be easily offended."
How true!! I've heard it a dozen times, but for some reason, heard it with new ears this time. Holly helped me see that people take offense all the time, but only because they let themselves. 9 times out of 10, offensive comments or behavior are unintentional. We did talk about the difference between being offended, and behavior and language that offends the Spirit of the Lord. Very interesting conversation.
For example: Say I'm wearing a green shirt. In a conversation with several people, one of them mentions that green is not a very complimentary color, and only few people should wear it.
a) Was that comment directed at me?
b) Would that person intentionally offend me?
c) Who really cares?
Unfortunately, most people don't stop and think of these things; it's human nature to jump that step and go right to taking offense. I'm guilty of it a thousand times over.
So, I asked Holly, if someone was using foul language and I was offended, was I CHOOSING to be offended at it? She stated that there is a difference, because that offends the Spirit of the Lord, and therefore offends those of us that are trying to keep the Spirit with us.
AH. Very true.
In the meantime, not being easily offended is something I choose to work on. It would make things so much easier; I wouldn't have unkind feelings about anyone, and it would save me a lot of pain and anguish over having offended someone, and feeling bad because I THINK I've offended someone, or someone feeling bad because they've offended me, or THINK they've offended me. Chances are, they haven't, or haven't meant to.
Now, if I could only work on not being filthy...

An Escape from the Mundane

For almost a year, I've been going 'walking' two or three times a week, during my lunch hour, with a friend at work. For almost the same amount of time, I've been trying to remember to take my digital camera on the route we take because it's absolutely beautiful. We walk from our office building over to State Street, up State to North Temple and veer right, toward City Creek; up through City Creek to Memory Grove, and up just a little ways into the canyon there. It's so scenic, it's hard to believe we work only a few minutes from there. So last week, when we got dumped on by all that snow, I talked to another secretary in the office that takes a similar walking route that we do. She said that Memory Grove and City Creek were so pretty, I should take my camera and get a few shots. So I did! I FINALLY took my camera out on our weekly walk. It took longer, because I kept stopping to take pictures.


Anyone that's been to the building where I work knows that we have a fantastic view from our conference room windows; But it's still inside rather than outside, and being outside is always better! Memory Grove and City Creek are awesome escapes from the mundane office existence.

I am so spoiled.

Good-bye, Twenties

I love this picture... I look so evil! Hehehehe...

But check out my lei! Thanks Mar and Melissa!

As I say good-bye to my twenties, I look back and see that: I made some not-so-smart financial decisions, I didn't date much but watched most of my friends get married and start families, I happily watched my sister get married, I made several friends... some of whom I have since lost track and then re-connected with, I've switched jobs 5 times, switched companies 3 times, moved home twice - only for short periods of time, however; I battled depression - but not alone; I watched 5 siblings head to the MTC while I sat home with no desire to serve a mission and felt guilty about it; I moved apartments/condos just about every year, I've lost friends and family to death, I've travelled around the continental U.S. a little bit, been to Hawaii twice, been to Europe once, and started a road-trip tradition to Southern California with my sisters and cousin Em (who, let's be honest, is just like my sister), watched 'internet dating' develop a lot (and even particiapted some, but with no real spectacular results - just the desire to meet someone the 'old-fashined way'), had one or two heartbreaks, went to more weddings and wedding receptions than I can count, had more roommates than I can count, bought my own car (and paid it off!), laughed, fought, loved, mourned, hated, cried, raged and relaxed.
In my thirties, I'm going to get out of debt, make better financial decisions, travel a little more (if I can), finish school, get married and start a family (I hope), buy my own house, focus on being a better member missionary, watch my youngest sister go on a mission, watch my brothers and sisters get married (HOPEFULLY), lose more friends and family to death (I'm sure), beat depression, run a half-marathon, go to more weddings and wedding receptions than I can count, continue the road-trip tradition even when we're all married, play with nieces and nephews, have more heartbreaks, meet more new friends and probably lose track of some old ones, laugh, fight, love, mourn, hate, cry, rage and relax some more.
I have ten years of '30s' and I'm going to enjoy them ALL!

Happy birthday to me! :)